


Tyler why are you a god now?

by AmericanMemer



Category: Banana Bus Squad
Genre: "imagine if you could live in clouds", Evan has great ideas, Fluff, I literally thought of this, M/M, Mythical stuff, Tyler is nice protective peep, and asking myself, by looking at clouds, this entire thing is a shitpost
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-21
Updated: 2017-12-18
Packaged: 2018-11-17 01:12:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,211
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11264871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmericanMemer/pseuds/AmericanMemer
Summary: Tyler is a GodEvan is just a dude





	1. The First Meeting

**Author's Note:**

> Find the bill wrutz reference

The small town where Evan lived was receiving the worst recorded storm yet that year. They were warned of it and everyone made preparations, except for Evan who was currently running unknowingly in the open street. The rain poured down, along with hail. Clouds becoming so thick and dark, It was hard to see and move, everything was against him. 

He could make out a shadow of something big and walked forward slowly, thinking he stumbled to his house. He failed to realize it was a car zooming towards him. 

"Fuck."

He braced himself when suddenly, there was no thud, no rain or hail, cracking of bones, nothing.

He opened his eyes and looked only to see soft white clouds. As he looked around, his thoughts started taking over. He panicked and thought he died and this was heaven.

"Relax you idiot, I just saved you don't stress yourself." Said a booming voice.

Evan, startled, turned around and shouted.  
"Where am I? Who are you?"

"Dude I just said relax, I'll tell you when you calm down."

Evan's breathing kept its fast pace as he tried to calm himself down. He heard a loud sigh and was blinded by a white light. Once gone he looked over to see a human, like him but..prettier.

"Will you calm down now?"

Evan nodded.

"Where you are is my home, and I just saved you from a nasty crash back in earth. You're welcome."

"Uh, thanks."

"My name is Tyler, and yours is Evan correct?"

"..yes?"

"Well are you sure, you don't sound like it."

"Yes, my name is Evan, I'm just surprised you somehow know that."

"Dude I know everything about you, I'm a god."

Evan just started wide eyed at Tyler, utterly confused.

"Yeah yeah, hard to believe I know but look. If you want to prove it as-"

"I believe you."

Tyler stood there a bit taken back, people usually never believe him and he has to do this stupid 'ask any question' deal.

"Huh, didn't expect that so quickly, easier for me I guess."

"So..why am I here?"

"I didn't want a kid like you to die so early, you've got a pretty sweet future from what I can see."

"I'm 23."

"Still a kid to me dude, I've lived for over two hundred thousand years. Compared to other gods, I'm in my twenties."

"Wait did you just-how are you-why are-what?"

"Yup. Two hundred thousand years old."

Evan just stared blankly. Processing the fact that he was with a god who was beyond 1000 times his age 

Why don't I show you around, this may be clouds but I do have a place. Afterwards I'll take you back home."

"O-ok."

They kept meeting up again for months, usually during events like Evan graduating college, getting a new house, or generally when the two wanted to.

\--

"Dude I brought some ancient vodka!"

"How ancient?"

"Older than me dude. Don't worry I won't let you drink the whole thing, just a thimble sized drink." "Two questions, how bad of a hangover will this give me? And what's it made of?" "I'll be staying over to make sure you won't die on me in the morning, so you won't have to be concerned. And it's made with a mixture of human and extreme ingredients."

"like..?"

"Well we got the obvious vodka, some assortment of fruits, essence of a hydra, and some tears from a siren! Some other things but i can't remember right now."

"...Alright I'll drink"

Tyler smiled and used his powers to created a small enough cup to make sure Evan wouldn't somehow overdose. Evan's first sip was his last. He doesn't remember anything beyond that moment, it's all just fuzzy, dark.  
\--

He awoke in his bed with Tyler right next to him, realizing they were both in their pajamas, and nearly on the floor. Evan rose slower than usual but was surprised by the fact that he felt fine. Tyler really did make sure he wouldn't suffer the aftermath 

"Tyler, what did I do last night?"

"You got so fucking wasted I was crying. You danced around in the library till you collapsed and I had to drag you away, ate a tub of humus while watching Dora, even asked to cuddle and admitted you liked me. You did a lot of weird shit, and no we didn't have sex, I didn't want you to be in more pain then you already were. Another time though."

"Wait...what other time?!"

"You'll see."

Evan blushed at this, He sat there processing the conversation until Tyler came back up with breakfast.

"Evan..hello?? Sheesh how far into your mind are you?"

Tyler flicked Evan's forehead which brought him back.

"Wha-"

"Made breakfast, let's eat."

Tyler sat down next to Evan and shoved his food into his mouth.

"It's been a while since I've had human food."

"The hell to gods eat then?"

"Energy, space dust, weird stuff. Only things close to humans are our meat and liquids."

"...what does space dust even taste like??"

"Sometimes chocolate, sometimes a pepper. Depends on what you like."

"I wanna try space dust.."

"Ok, once your done I'll show you."

"Wait really?"

"Yeah it's not impossible you dope."

\--  
Evan was awe struck, surrounded by the enormous cluster of stars and galaxies. At first he freaked out, knowing that humans can't breathe in space, but Tyler gave him a small shield which kept him alive. While Evan was staring into space Tyler was looking at which type of space dust to give to Evan.

"Want something spicy? Or sour? Sweet?"

Evan heard him but kept staring off into space, still baffled that he was out here.

"Evan, what flavor?"

"Huh? Oh! Sorry, it's just, I'm in space and..it's beautiful."

"Ok, but before you go back into your mind tell me what you like, we got some sweet dust over here, and some spicy dust.."

"I'll take the spicy dust if you can."

"Ok, hold on."

Tyler's hand glowed, attracting small particles until they formed a small ball, glowing red.

"It's freaking spicy, so be careful."

He handed Evan the ball and Evan took one bite from it. He regretted that more than the vodka he drank last night. After a few seconds his mouth literally spat fire. Evan didn't know what to do and Tyler was no help, he was just laughing. So Evan used the fire and spat some at him.

"Hey hey! Don't spit fire at me, you're not a damn dragon!"

\--

Evan was returned home after his mouth was extinguished. He invited Tyler into his house, and flopped down on the couch. Flipping through channels he looked at the news and saw something that got his attention. 

"NASA is reporting that one of their satellites took this photo, of two men in space. They claim to have no idea if it was just two comets or other forms of life."

The reporter continued on, Evan sat there on the brink of laughter and tears. Tyler was already falling off the couch, crying.

"FUCKING NASA NOTICED US I CAN'T BREATHE EVAN!"

"I feel your pain Tyler." And with that Evan joined his laughter.


	2. More adventures with these fucks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I just decided to add some weird shit to this since we all seem to enjoy it. My god thanks for waiting I have something on the way but I'm stuck so uh TAKE THIS FUCKERS YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was done in a day so if it's not all there with the first that's probably why

Evan was chilling at his place watching TV when he say a new movie. The movie was mainly about eight creatures who roamed the vast earth and stars. As soon as his brain processed this he called Tyler. 

"What's up Evan?"

"Tyler I have the perfect idea for us"

"..go on."

"Meet me at my place in a few I need to get ready."

"Ok..?"

With that Evan threw his phone on the couch and got dressed and then heard a door being opened.

"Alright what's the idea you dope?"

Evan rushed out his room and showed Tyler the movie, where a red dragon and blue hydra were battling together using there own selection of powers. Red breathing fire down at the hydra which in turn shot hydro pumps of water.

"..oh my fucking god Evan you are a genus!"

"Alright we need to watch the entire thing tho because there are more and I want to make sure you can make them."

"After what I just saw dude I'm down."

And so after an hour and a half they witnessed all the creatures. Most of them were mythical creatures. The first one shown was a a blood red dragon with golden eyes, maroon horns pointing up, and beautiful leather wings that matched. Next was a huge orange fairy horde, with so many they glowed bright orange and left a trail behind wherever they went. A yellow alicorn was up next, with a magical horn that was able to grant wishes and slow time, the speed it flew at was so fast it-

"WAS LIKE MOTHERFUCKING QUICKSLIVER"

Tyler can I finish?

"Yeah I just wanted to say that"

"Tyler who are you talking to?"

"You'll know when the day comes."

Either way..a green basilisk came next, it's stare was controlled, so it wouldn't turn people to stone whenever it wanted to look at them. You would know when someone would be turned to stone as the large serpents eyes would glow lime as a warning. The next in the rainbow is a hydra, capable of shooting water in massive jets when ever it can due to a hidden gem in its body that's able to do so. Third to last is a purple tinted griffin with the ability to see into the future and is seen as the most powerful in the rainbow creatures.

The last two are rivals, one being a black orthros with the ability to cause planetary chaos and bring death to anyone it sees fit. The other being a white Chimera, who was the complete opposite of orthros, able to bring peace and tranquility to anyone.

"Jesus I'm glad that's over..ALRIGHT LETS FUCKING DO THIS SHIT EVAN!"

"HELL YEAH LETS GO TO SPACE!"

Tyler took Evan's hand and dragged him out the door and into the vast space, not too far from earth.

"Alright so what do you want? I'm taking the Hydra that's badass"

"Hmm, I'll take the alicorn because fuck yeah I'm gonna stab you."

"Is like to see you try-"

Tyler's eyes suddenly went white and glowed for a brief moment.

".  
.  
M̴̬̹͍̺̲̠̺͎̤̐͆̀͆̂̚͟ò̷͇̖̪͔͍̫͕̐̿̅̿́̍̊͑r̴͇̱͕͍̲̹̻̂̄̈̍̔̃͡͠͠͠ͅt̷̙͚̝͚̝͍̓̾̇̓̍͐͘͢͠a̶̠̹̰̾̏̍̿̏̀̀͜͜͞l̸̨̪̩̣̼̜̤͍͖̀̔̃̈͘͘  
.

 

"Holy fucking shit Tyler don't do that"

"PFFT DID I REALLY SCARE YOU?!"

"YES WHAT DO YOU THI- fuck it FIGHT ME!"

"ALRIGHT LETS DO THIS!"

Tyler's right hand began to glow a dark blue as his other a bright yellow. He floated away and stretched his hands upwards, opening two portals the the same color for the hand they were summoned from.

"I forgot how awesome this gets. Wish I could do that.."

"You will."

"wait wHAT?!"

"Nothing now shush I need to concentrate."

Through the portals came the creatures they both desired. Evan's majestic alicorn, glowing a honey color with a yellow body to blend. It's cry was that of beauty and triumph as Evan stared awe struck still. Tyler's terrifying hydra crawled out of its portal, with a legendary screech from each head. The scales it wore were a deep blue that was calming as a false hope mechanism. This creature was harsh and destructive and Tyler loved it.

"Holy...something."

Tyler's hands stopped glowing and he lowered them.

"Fuck yeah it's something."

"So we fight with these?"

"It's your idea dude, I just wanted to summon them."

Evan thought for a moment, while a fight would be awesome, the risks they would take are too much. What if they get seen by NASA gain and somehow they fire a missile? Or if one of them gets really hurt? The alicorn has a damn sharp horn. 

"Let's fight, but keep it moderately safe and far from earth. One time for NASA is enough."

"Good call, where to though?"

"Let's try Pluto!"

"Perfect range! Onward we go!"

Tyler pointed in one direction and suddenly they were on Pluto, and thanks to Tyler's magic they won't die even if they were in the sun. Though the eyes wouldn't survive.

"Alright this is a great distance, ready up!"

Evan ran over to his alicorn while Tyler was sitting atop the tallest head on his hydra.

"Wow..I can't believe this is real."

The alicorn snorted as Evan hopped on, ready for battle.

"You good down there?!"

"Yeah! Let's do this!"

With that Tyler immediately shot down three jets of water from the front, Evan was quick to dodge thankfully, and countered with a bright golden plasma beam towards one of the heads and flew around behind to attack there. 

"YOU BITCH EVAN!"

Tyler fired four other jets at Evan, grazing the alicorn's legs. 

"GODDAMNIT."

Evan then had an idea, he quickly said to the alicorn-

"I wish I had a flaming sword."

Suddenly the alicorn's horn glowed and Evan held out his hand to grab the materializing sword.

"I would say that's cheating but it can do that so fuck."

Evan dived down and cut two heads off the hydra, and thanks to the flames the wounds were cartorlized and it wouldn't grow back.

"Fuck! I'll make you pay for that Evan!"

With that all remaining head shot out jets of water in Evan's direction. Evan tried dodging but one got lucky and hit him dead on. Knocking out the alicorn and making Evan fall to the ground with a loud thud.

"Oh shit! You good?!"

"...some-ow-what.."

Tyler hopped off the hydra and desummoned the creatures. Running over to Evan, and healing him quickly. 

"Jesus I'm so fucking sorry Evan please don't murder me."

"I'm ok, see? I'm not dead."

"Well thank god for that but for real you good?" 

"Yeah, that was a nasty fall but I can live. Besides you're healing me so I'm all set here. Thanks dude."

Tyler leaned down and hugged Evan while in the process of healing him.

"I will never do that shit again."

"Awww, do you love me?"

"Well yeah, if I didn't you would've been sent to hell by now."

"...didn't expect that answer but, I feel the same."

"What a lovely time to discover that, having you getting injured."

They both laughed. After a few moments Evan was back to feeling brand new and heading home.

"Hey Tyler?"

"Hm?"

"Wanna stay at my place and keep watching movies we can reenact?"

"Sure why not, but I'm not fighting again, I don't like seeing you hurt in anyway."

"Aw."

Evan reached up and kissed Tyler's cheek and smiled.

"Thanks for caring, now come on we need more ideas."

Tyler stood there blushing until Evan picked him up and threw him on the couch where they chilled for the rest of the hour. Also discovering that most space stations were able to see them summoning the creatures. 

"We gotta stop that before NASA has a stroke."

"Couldn't agree more Tyler.."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have work in the morning and I'm writing this while listening to "Take on me-shittyflute" fucking god where am I.


	3. Egg

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Egg

Evan’s sitting on the couch scrolling through his phone while Tyler’s making eggs at his request.

“Yo Evan how do you like your eggs?”

“Deviled”

“Are you fucking kidding me it’s six am choose something easier you dick.”

“Hardboiled”

“Evan I swear to god I’m going to launch you into the sun.”

“Fine, poached.”

“Really? Never saw you as that type..”

“...wait”

“What did you realize Evan?”

“Did I just catch a fuckin god off guard with eggs?”

“...yeah?”

Evan proceeds to jump up off the couch and run around flipping out because he just psyched out a fucking god. Tyler stares and questions himself. 

“Why do I even stay with you..”

“Because you love me!”

Evan tackles Tyler in a crushing hug and Tyler wheezes.

“I OVERPOWERED YOU BITCH LETS GO!”

“EVAN I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL SMASH THESE EGGS OVER YOUR HEAD”


	4. Christmas with these nerds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Evan and Tyler have been together for over two years now; and Evan feels the need to somehow pay him back.

As Evan paced through isle after isle in the third store today, his anxiety grew harsher with every minute passing. He didn’t know how to get Tyler a Christmas gift. His exasperated look changed into a glowing one when he thought about food. He went into the cooking isle and gathered the proper ingredients to create the perfect cake for the two of them. Placing them in his small cart he checked more of the store to see what else Tyler would like. Remembering that he likes video games ever since Evan introduced GTA to him, he grabbed the newest Call Of Duty game and went to the checkout.

—

It was only the day before Christmas Eve and Evan wasn’t even close to being ready. Recording with his friends got in the way quite a bit and the rest was spent editing or sleeping. So he was scrambling to get the cake ready by tomorrow. He told Tyler that it was his turn to shop and, after a bit of arguments, Tyler agreed and headed out. This gave Evan enough time to wrap him present and get started on the cake mix. 

—

When Tyler came back he closed the door quietly so he could sneak up and scare the shit out of Evan. He went and placed the bags down on the couch to muffle the sound and crept over to the lit kitchen. He popped his head around the corner and saw Evan putting the final touches on a lovely looking chocolate cake. Tyler snuck up behind Evan right as he was basking in the glory of this beautiful chocolate cake he created. 

“SURPRISE BITCH”

Evan screamed as Tyler grasped his shoulders firmly.

“wHY DID YOU DO THAT I NEARLY KNOCKED THE CAKE OVER YOU DICK.”

“Because I saw the opportunity and took it. It’s always fun scaring you.”

Evan clenched his chest  
“Jesus you need to stop that.”

“Listen if you die I’ll bring you back nerd. What’s with the cake though?”

Evan’s eyes widened at the question and hesitated to answer.

“It’s..it’s nothing. I’m making it for a friend.”

Tyler rolled his eyes, seeing right through Evan’s plans; he was a god after all.  
“Really? You sure it’s not for little ol’ me?”

“First of all you are 6’5” and second all you said before you were 200 thousand years old.”

“Holy shit how did you remember that..”

“I may be human but don’t you dare underestimate my memory bitch.”

“Ok..but really who’s the cake for you suck at lying.”

“Fucking...for you..”

“You cute motherfucker!”

Tyler grabbed Evan in for a bear hug. Crushing Evan to the point of him wheezing out.

“yo-u’re wel-com-e”

“Oh shit sorry.”

Evan gasped for air as Tyler released him.

“Sorry, my strength sometimes gets active at random. You good?”

“Don’t worry I’m fine!”

Tyler smiled happily. 

“Let’s eat the cake now!”

“I was going to save it for tomorrow but fuck it.”

The two grabbed their own slices of cake and went into the living room and turned on the tv. As Evan scrolled through channels he noticed Tyler was really moving. He looked over to see him with eyes glowing and the fork still in his mouth.

“Tyler are you ok?”

Tyler took the form out of his mouth and with the most shocked expression Evan has ever seen he said this:

“Teach me how to bake like this you goddamn wizard.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if you don’t like these types of ending but I do. I’ll try and steer away in the future but it’s hard because I just drone on and on. And no one really likes that. But if you enjoyed nice now go to sleep/school.

**Author's Note:**

> 6/21/17  
> This is my longest fic yet. Neat


End file.
